Think He’s Cheating? How To Know For Sure

There’s only one thing worse than finding out that your partner’s cheating: suspecting that your partner’s cheating. Unfortunately, it’s not always as simple as just asking your partner for the truth. One of the most common ways for unfaithful partners to deflect accusations of cheating is to dismiss their partners’ concerns as paranoia. Some even turn the tables and accuse their partners of pondering infidelity.

If you can’t catch your partner in the act, there are red flags to look for (suspicious errands, a sudden change in grooming or appearance, etc.), but what if you’re not 100 percent sure? Should you end your relationship without any hard evidence of infidelity, or wait passively for the truth to come out?

In the past, worried spouses hired expensive private detectives to do the dirty work, if they could afford to pay thousands of dollars. Now Infidelity DNA Testing, operated by the national DNA testing company Paternity Lab Center, makes it easy for any man or woman to scientifically confirm cheating, CSI-style. All it involves is sending in an item that’s potential evidence, like dirty underwear, bedsheets, condoms, or even cigarette butts, and having it tested for DNA. Should viable DNA be detected, you can then pay an additional fee for a comparison test to see if the DNA on your partner’s item matches yours. If not, you know someone’s got some ‘splainin’ to do. The whole process costs $600 at the most.

The whole process sounds icky and even sneaky, yes. But we’re talking about cheating! It comes with the territory. And while not all cheating partners are dumb enough to leave incriminating, bodily fluid-soaked undies around, many of them are. You deserve to know the truth, and no one can deny the validity of DNA. Even better, you’ll know the truth within five business days. And then you can move on with your relationship… or not.

Kip Charles, owner of the Paternity Lab Center, reports that the majority of people who call Infidelity DNA Testing are men who suspect their girlfriends or wives are cheating.

“More men call to find out how the process works, but most don’t actually go through with it,” Charles says. “Women are more likely to pull the trigger and actually submit an item for testing.” He says that about 70% of clients confirm that their partner was cheating as they suspected. “Maybe 30% of clients are wrong about their suspicions, but I’d say the rest already know something’s wrong. They know there’s a serious decision they have to make, but they have to be sure.”

The lesson: If you think your partner is cheating, follow your gut, but don’t forget all the technology—or dirty laundry—at your disposal.

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Housemaid accused of killing baby born out of adulterous relationship

A 29-year-old Ethiopian housemaid allegedly smothered her newborn baby girl born through an adulterous relationship by putting her in a bag and keeping it closed for about six hours, the Dubai Criminal Court heard.

JAA is accused of premeditatedly killing her one day-old baby girl by wrapping her in a cloth and putting her in a bag and closing the bag with the intention to kill her. The accused denied killing the baby and claimed that she was born dead. However, the forensic report said the baby was born alive and she was fed milk and the cause of her death was suffocation.

AMI, 17, Emirati student, testified that the accused had been working for the family since July 2011 and used to stay in the helpers’ quarter in their villa’s yard. On April 26, the maid excused herself from housework, saying she is tired. On the following day, the family asked her to go out with them and were in fact intending to deport her.
“When the maid went to the bathroom, my grandmother started searching her bags. She searched the first bag and was opening the second one when the maid came out of the bathroom. She tried to prevent her from carrying on with her search but my grandmother insisted. Then the maid pulled out a wrapped piece of cloth and towel and said that there is a baby in it. She claimed that she brought the baby from outside. Checking the wrap we found a dead baby,” he testified.

The grandmother, AHS, 60, repeated the same testimony.

Police investigated the case and found out that the baby must have born alive after nine months of pregnancy. Forensic reported that the baby’s lungs were in ‘floating’ condition which clearly indicated that she had breathed air after delivery, contrary to the mother’s claim that she was born dead. Also, milky residues were found in her digestive organ in addition to hard waste in her intestine which means that the baby was fed more than once.

Forensic report that, from the wet condition of the umbilical cord, it appears that the baby was born either on April 25 or 26. Suffocation, and not the baby’s head injury, was the cause of her death, the report said.
The accused confessed before the police that the baby was the result of her adulterous relationship with AK who is being prosecuted by the Misdemeanor Court with JAA for adultery.

Records did not mention how JAA met AK and whether she continued her relationship with him after joining her employer. It also did not mention whether he asked her or encouraged her to kill the baby.

The accused claimed that the baby was born dead on April 26.

“She was not moving when she was born. I cut the umbilical cord with a knife which was in the room. I wrapped her in a cloth and put her on the bed at 8am. I was very scared that my adulterous relationship with a man would be discovered. I wrapped her body in a towel and put her in a bag and closed it until 2pm,” she testified.

Later the accused admitted before the police to giving birth to a live baby girl in her room and that nobody was with her when she delivered the baby girl on April 26, testified police officer Saeed Salem.
She admitted that she had put the baby in a bag and closed the bag so that nobody would discover her illegal and illicit relationship with a man that resulted in the baby.

She confessed to having adulterous relation with a man in August 2011. Police arrested AK with whom who she claimed she had adulterous relationship.

Forensic reported that AK was the real father and the accused was the real mother of the baby.

The accused, however, again giving birth to a live baby when she appeared before the prosecution and on Monday when she appeared in court.

“I gave birth to a stillborn baby. I did not kill my baby but she was born dead,” JAA told the jury presided by judge Hamad Abdullatif Abdul Jawad who ordered the appointment of a defence lawyer and to reconvene on October 15.

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Influence Of Social Media On Infidelity

Social media sites are beneficial in connecting with friends and relatives residing in different parts of the world. Social media also plays a deadly role in divorce and many American couple are breaking their marriage relationship and getting divorced due to social media networks. It is reported that 81% of lawyers from the American academy of matrimonial lawyers has pulled information from different social networking sites to fight for their clients regarding the divorce issue. 66% of lawyers use face book,15% use My Space and 5% information is taken is from twitter.

Mostly social media sites are used for cheating and flirting strangers on the other side and it is discovered that 1 out of 5 adults use face book site for flirting. It is reported that 235 of men usually tend to cheat the women and 19% of women who are not sexually satisfied use social media for cheating.

It is suggested to say no to face book and delete the account if it becomes burden and effects your marriage life.

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Woman tries to sell home by advertising husband’s infidelity

It’s no secret that it can be pretty hard to sell a home these days, but a woman in Oregon is using a very personal story to win over buyers.

She’s openly advertising the fact that her husband cheated on her and then left her with the home!

Elle Zober’s sign says “Husband left us for a 22-year-old” and goes on to read, “For sale by scorned, slightly bitter, newly-single owner.”

Before you think this is an act of revenge, Zober says her ex-husband was actually on board with the idea and even helped her with the sign.

She says they both need to move on and to do that, they have to sell the house.

“I’m certainly not the first person to be cheated on and I won’t be the last.”

Zober says she needs every competitive edge she can get in this housing market.

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Facts About Cheating

According to some new surveys, computer networking guys are near the top of the cheater list…right up there with other rich professionals like bankers and lawyers. And 40-something married fathers of two are most likely to cheat in a marriage. As for women cheaters, they are most likely to be stay-at-home moms, teachers, and health care workers.

Those results come from PRWeb.com. Here are some more current stats:

Research shows that up to 3% of all children are the product of infidelity, and most of these children are unknowingly raised by men who are not their biological fathers.

Some cultures have adopted extreme measures to combat infidelity, like DEATH as a punsihment!

Although men are more likely to cheat than women, as women become more financially independent, they act more like men in regard to cheating.

In many cases, infidelity never gets discovered…and the cheater gets away with it.

Emotionally, it IS possible to have feelings for more than one person at a time…but LOVING more than one person is difficult to do.

Office romances continue to increase. Spouses often spend more time with coworkers than with each other.

The initial decision to be unfaithful is rarely ever a rational choice. It is usually driven by one’s emotions. In fact, most people are surprised by their own behavior at the start of an affair.

Emotional infidelity can inflict as much, if not more, hurt, pain and suffering than just the physical act itself.

Unfortunately, many people find a more suitable mate AFTER they are already married.

Biological evidence shows that long-term monogamy is difficult for humans to achieve…but NOT IMPOSSIBLE.

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12 Warning Signs That It’s Emotional Infidelity – And Not ‘Just Friendship’

A new sort of infidelity has been on the rise for decades, and it’s one of the biggest threats to marriage: ‘emotional affairs.’ Today’s workplace has become the new danger zone of opportunities for ‘emotional affairs,’ surpassed only by the Internet.

A relationship without sex can be just as intense, or more so than a sexual one. Not surprisingly, in most cases, approximately 80% according to Dr. Shirley Glass, author of Not Just Friends: Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity, the dynamics of these platonic liaisons crosses over into sexual love sooner or later.

Why the crisis?

To understand the intensity of emotional infidelity, it helps to see the dynamics as an addiction, a form of addictive love. That’s because it’s easier to let go of a toxic pattern when you depersonalize the experience.

It’s not about ‘how’ special the person is or makes you feel, it’s about the neurochemicals that get activated when you think and behave a certain way that keeps you stuck in the damaging pattern! It isn’t a coincidence, for example, that persons with alcohol and other addictions are more likely to get into toxic relationships. Seeing the problem as an addiction also gives you access to proven steps to identify and break free of the toxic patterns.

Why addictive?

An addiction to an activity, person or substance puts a person’s brain and body in an intoxicating trance that, on the one hand, does not allow them to think clearly and make informed choices, and on the other hand, ‘rewards’ them for the toxic behavior with the release of certain chemicals that provide quick-fixes of pleasure in the body. Albeit temporary, there is also pleasure from lowering or numbing pain, shame or guilt, as it provides distance from taking responsibility to resolve the real issues of life and marriage (which risk failure).

In the The Addictive Personality: Understanding the Addictive Process and Compulsive Behavior Craig Nakken provides the following definition for addiction, as:

“A pathological love and trust relationship with an object [person] or event … the out-of-control and aimless searching for wholeness, happiness, and peace through a relationship with an object or event.”

It makes sense that so many depressives and alcoholics find themselves in toxic relationships.

What are the warning signs?

There are at least 12 warning signs to alert you to take action to protect yourself and your relationship from ‘emotional infidelity.’

1. Thinking and saying you’re ‘just friends’ with opposite-sex.

If you’ve been thinking or saying, “we’re just friends,” think again. If it’s a member of the opposite sex, you may be swimming in treacherous waters. The very words are dangerous to your marriage.

This rationale allows you to make excuses, or more plainly, to tell lies (to yourself and others) about something you know in your gut is wrong. Regardless how strongly TV and entertainment promote the idea of opposite-sex friendships (and this is part of the problem!) as not only ‘okay,’ but also ‘right’ to demand unconditional trust, in most cases, an intimate friendship with a member of the opposite-sex that you find interesting and attractive poses risks.

2. Treating them as a confidant, sharing intimate issues.

Sharing thoughts and deepest concerns, hopes and fears, passions and problems is what deepens intimacy; it builds an emotional bond between two people, time better used in marriage relationship. Giving this away to another person, regardless of the justification, is infidelity, a betrayal of trust. This is especially true when you consider that emotional intimacy is the most powerful bond in human relationships, much stronger than a sexual one.

3. Discussing troubling aspects of your marriage and partners.

Talking or venting to a person of the opposite sex about what your marriage lacks, what your partner lacks, or what you’re not getting to make you happy sends a loud message that you’re available for someone else to ‘love and care’ for your needs. It’s also a breach of trust. And, like gossip, it creates a false sense of shared connection, and an illusion that you, your happiness, your comfort and needs are totally valued by this person (when, in truth, this has not been put to the test!).

4. Comparing them verbally and mentally to your partner.

Another danger sign is a thinking pattern that increasingly finds what is ‘positive’ and ‘just right’ about the friend and ‘negative’ and ‘unfulfilling’ about the partner. This builds a case ‘for’ the friend and ‘against’ the partner. Another mental breach of trust, this unfairly builds a physiologically felt case ‘for’ the friend and ‘against’ the partner, forming mental images in the brain that associate pleasurable and painful sensations accordingly.

5. Obsessively thinking or daydreaming about the person.

If you find yourself looking forward to seeing the person, cannot wait to share news, think about what you’re going to tell them when you’re apart, and imagine their excitement, you’re in trouble. This sense of expectation, excitement, anticipation releases dopamine in reward centers of your brain, reinforcing toxic patterns. Obsessively thinking about the person is an obvious signal that something is wrong. After all, you don’t do this with your friends, right?

6. Believing this person ‘gets’ you like no other.

It always appears this way in affairs and romantic encounters at the start. It’s an illusion, and in the case of emotional infidelity, one that is dangerous to a marriage because the sense of mutual ‘understanding’ forms a bond that strengthens and deepens emotional intimacy, with the release of pleasurable neurochemicals, such as the love and safety hormone oxytocin. This focus also puts you in a ‘getting’ frame of mind. It means you are approaching your marriage in terms of what you’re getting or not getting, rather than what you’re contributing.

7. Pulling out of regular activities with your partner, family, work.

Being absorbed with desire to spend more and more time talking, sharing, being with the person, it’s only natural to begin to resent time you spend on responsibilities and activities at home (and work?). As a result, you begin to pull away, turn down, or make excuses for not joining regular activities with your partner and family. Family members notice you are withdrawn, irritable and unhappy.

8. Keeping what you do secret and covering up your trail.

Secrecy itself is a warning sign. It creates a distinct closeness between two people, and at the same time grows the distance between them and others. Secrets create a special bond, most often an unhealthy one. For example, there may be a false sense of emotional safety and trust with the person, and an unwarranted mistrust and suspicion of the partner, or those who try to interfere with the ‘friendship.’

9. Keeping a growing list of reasons that justify your behaviors.

This involves an addictive pattern of thinking that focuses your attention on how unhappy you are, why you’re unhappy, and blames your partner and marriage for all aspects of your unhappiness. It builds a dangerous sense of entitlement and forms a pool of resentment from which you feel justified to mistreat your partner or do what you need to increase your happiness without considering the consequences.

10. Fantasizing about a love or sexual relationship with the person.

At some point, one or both persons begin to fantasize about having a love or sexual relationship with the other. They may begin to have discussions about this, which adds to the intensity, the intrigue and the intoxicating addictive releases of neurochemicals that make the pattern more entrenched.

11. Giving or receiving personal gifts from the person.

Another flag is when the obsession affects your buying behaviors, so that you begin to think about this person when you are shopping, wondering what they like or would show your appreciation. The gift choices are something intimate items that you would not give ‘just’ a friend. Gifts send clear messages that the two of you are a ‘close we’ set apart from others, and that the relationship is ‘special.’

12. Planning to spend time alone together or letting it happen.

This is the warning sign that, when not heeded, most often pushes partners to cross the line from a platonic to a sexual relationship. Despite good intentions and promises to one another that they would not let ‘anything’ happen, it’s a set up, a matter of time, when opposite-sex friends flirt with the availability of time alone.

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Anti-cheating ring’ leaves an ‘I’m married’ imprint on finger

Spouses with wandering eyes should take notice – slipping off your wedding band might not let you off scot-free, anymore.

The blogosphere is buzzing over a new ring that promises to keep spouses faithful by imprinting the words, “I’m married” into the wearer’s finger. The declaration is carved into the inside of the band.

The cost of fidelity? Just $550.

The titanium rings are sold on the website TheCheeky.com.

“With Arnold, Tiger and two timing IMF guy in mind, we have created this wedding ring for people intent on cheating,” the company writes, poking fun at some high-profile cases of infidelity.

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Emotional Infidelity: Signs You Might be Crossing the Lines

In this day and age, most of us have friends of the opposite sex, whether they are co-workers, casual acquaintances or close confidantes. The question is: how close is too close when you’re in a romantic relationship with someone else? Here are some signs that your so-called friendship may be entering the not-so-gray area of emotional infidelity:

1. You dress up for him. When you buy new clothes or change your hairstyle and wonder what he’ll think (instead of how your partner will react) that’s a danger sign. We all consider our audience when we’re getting ready to go out, but doing so with a particular other in mind — not your significant other — suggests there’s something more here than meets the eye.

2. You lie to your significant other about seeing him. Perhaps you fail to mention an innocent coffee you had with him. You consider it just a small omission, not to be confused with a real lie, when you don’t share it with your significant other. Maybe you even tell yourself you just forgot. If this is the case, you must ask yourself what you’re hiding from your partner and why.

3. You do special things for him that you don’t do for others. You give him that cute card that perfectly captures how you feel about your friendship, or the little knickknack from your last trip which you imagine him placing on his desk. It seems innocent enough, but they are little reminders of you and invitations to reciprocate. What are your true intentions about this relationship and this person?

4. You’re spending more and more time away from home and/or your significant other. Late nights at the office are starting to add up. Long lunches are becoming routine. When you really think about it, you can see you’re trying to increase your opportunity to spend time with him at the expense of the time you spend with your significant other. What is all this time with him really about?

5. Your electronic communications are increasingly devoted to your non-significant other. You can’t wait to surreptitiously check your phone to see the latest text from him. You’re up in the middle of the night on Facebook. When the balance of who you communicate with tips away from your significant other toward someone else, it’s a sure sign of trouble in both relationships.

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Divorcees finding new meaning to ‘cheating’ spouses

PHOENIX — Experts say many American couples stayed together during the recession because they couldn’t afford to go their separate ways.

Now the improving economy could trigger a spike in divorces, which can be a nightmare as the April 17 tax deadline approaches.

The Roosevelt Institute found that states with a higher increase in unemployment saw larger drops in divorce rates between 2005 and 2009.

There’s evidence that the mild economic recovery of 2011 has led to a rebound of divorces and if the unemployment rate continues to fall that trend can be expected to continue.

Bill Brunson, a spokesman for the Internal Revenue Service, said even after divorce, if an audit finds prior tax fraud during the marriage, both parties are on the hook for the full tax amount owed.

“Generally, that’s the case because both spouses benefited from that income,” he said.

But in certain circumstances a husband or wife may not have to pay tax, interest and penalties.

“The couple is no longer together and one spouse had no benefit or knowledge of the other spouse’s income, the IRS will work with them,” said Brunson.

The tax burden can be lifted if a former spouse can establish being the victim of abuse or domestic violence and did not challenge the tax returns truthfulness for fear of retaliation.

“You’ve got reasonable cause for the IRS to look at that and understand those are unique circumstances,” said Brunson.

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